Have you ever remarked “one can only imagine” in response to a comment made by another? Admittedly, such a comment can likely have an intended element of sarcasm; but that doesn’t mean that I won’t go out of my way to ask you if you have ever concluded, for reasons best known to yourself – or more likely not, as the case may be – that you can “only imagine” about something when the truth is that you just won’t out of nothing more than blissful ignorance. I insist that a professional translator worth their salt doesn’t just “only imagine” when they are at work.
Now, time for me to lampoon Malinda Kathleen Reese again. What follows is a joke about her, which I made up:
I had a dream in which I saw a million monkeys typing on a million typewriters – later on, there was Malinda Kathleen Reese singing what they had written (although I have posted this in a tweet before).
All I’ll say is that her Google Translate videos can only beg the question of how much she “imagined” when she just chucked the lyrics through Google Translate (several languages) – let it take the lead completely, as it were. Let a piece of freely available online software take the lead, post a bunch of daft humorous videos on YouTube as enabled by it, and routinely look on as her views and followers count increase. That’s all she did. She has a net worth of $5 million from a career which started with this (read her Wikipedia article)? NB That’s not to say that I don’t acknowledge that she really is a good singer capable of some fine work of genuine creative merit elsewhere. But seriously, the Twisted Translations videos look like something that a modern day idle teenager with too much time on their hands would create, and Malinda is 28 at the time of me putting this up! I mean, where do you think the expression “You’re making about as much sense as Malinda!” came from? Courtesy of yours truly 😉
Myself, I just want to get translation right – and help others, even my competitors, to do the same. If that doesn’t make me a bona fide credit to my industry, I really don’t know what will. After all, this is what I do for a living. And my desire behind me writing this article has left me with an urge to re-evaluate not just my own provable talents as a professional translator but my very judgement in my capacity as one.
Anyway, try to understand that this article, just like all my other articles, was written by me with the goal of promoting myself as a self-employed translator – me trying to build/reinforce an image of authority in my selected field, as I offer my peers original language-related food for thought and maybe even entertain them a bit. And why not? After all, when you think about it, doing translation right does indeed require imagining – not that “imagination” in this sense should be taken as purely making stuff up, like it is when one is writing fiction; that said, it is important to be understanding yet impartial regarding the consequences of it all. I’m essentially trying to outline the banner that the principle of empathy, among other things, falls under. I’m sure the creators of Detroit: Become Human understand this all very well. What I’m saying is that no-one should fail to realise that an ability to understand – nay imagine – certain things can be precluded not just by thickness or delusion but by stubbornness or narcissism – character flaws. Suffice it to say that we are all equals – at least on paper.
If you’ve ever felt lost or afraid for reasons you just couldn’t quite come to terms with, let me posit this: will there ever be a word describing that “feeling OK” is more important than feeling “happy” (excited, ecstatic, whatever)? Where the meaning implies that sincerity is more important than gratification. Because right now, in all humility, such an idea sure seems imperative in my mind!
Or this: https://everydaypower.com/quotes-about-education/ I couldn’t put up this list of fascinating quotes on education by accident – could you? We can’t know everything, and by that, some conundrums in translation brought on by differences between languages seem insurmountable even to professional translators (like me). So I ask you: hypothetically, could you ever get a machine translator to render “I hate you” as “I want to hate you” (for example, if you did what Malinda does for her Twisted Translations videos)? But here’s the thing: can the idea of “wanting to hate someone” be validated? And what would it say about the person doing it? Hate always hurts the hater but personally I get the impression that some people do it only to “fill the void” in their lives – assert (if only unto themselves, most likely) an inherent value which, if we’re being honest, is just non-existent. And that’s not only imagining.